Home again, home again...and other miscellaneous updates

So I'm finally home after what I can confidently call the craziest semester of my life. 18 hours...never EVER again. This semester, I took American Literature 1, British Literature 1, Digital Imaging, Drawing 1, History of Graphic Design, and finally, Spanish 201, a correspondence course that I took through the University of Florida...why yes, that does mean that I taught myself the entire course. It was just plain painful.

Now I'm here at home and couldn't be more cozied in. My first night home I slept 14 hours. It was glorious. This is my second Christmas as a college student, and living away from home, I've realized that it's the little things I miss. Sure, sure, sounds cheesy and cliche, but for me, it's oh so true. I've missed Dad falling asleep in his chair. I've missed Shadow greeting me in the driveway by walking directly up to one of my headlights and just standing there. I've missed Mom and Allie laughing at their own jokes, so much so that I eventually join in, too. All in all, home is so very home to me. There's a peace here that's just unattainable when I'm in the midst of schoolwork, and the freedom that comes with Christmas and summer breaks can't be matched by the breaks that fall in the middle of a semester.

I've also gotten a chance to work on some personal projects. I designed a birthday party invitation and I'm in the process of designing Carson-Newman's Spring Formal 2010 shirt! How exciting is that?

Since I've been home, I finally got around to cleaning/rearranging my room. It's much more spacious, and to reward myself for my hard work, I bought my first real piece of furniture: a beautiful dark wood papasan chair from Pier 1. It was an exciting experience. :)

Last week, we had our annual friends' Christmas party last week. Every year since our freshman year of high school, my 5 girls from high school and I get together, draw names (ahead of time), and exchange gifts. It's always interesting to see how much we all grow and change in a year, yet we all still come together and enjoy one another's company.

It's an exciting time in my life...am I really growing up?

Glimpse

Today I was at a gas station, and a well-dressed, middle-aged woman stormed in. She jumped in front of me in line and slammed her hand down on the counter. Angry woman proceeded to scream at the poor lady across the counter. Angry woman was ticked that the pump machine wouldn't take her card; the worker apologized, and the conversation ended when angry woman screamed, "THAT's the reason that machine is out there - so I don't have to come in here and look at you!"

WOW.... crazy! I just stood there with my mouth open, not even trying to hide my disgust! This whole incident got me thinking that that's all it takes - one little moment might be all you convey about yourself to someone else. How frightening. It scares me to think what glimpses of my character other people have seen. Don't hear what I'm not saying - I'm going to mess up. And people will see that. But regardless, I've got to keep in mind that my public actions and choices are just that - public, and accordingly, representative of God and of my character.

What glimpse am I giving? What glimpses are you giving?

Update

The group arrived in London earlier this morning EST. They boarded a plane headed for Dubai at approximately 9 am EST today (11/19) and will arrive in Dubai approximately 12 hours later. Next, there's a 3.5 hour flight into Kolkata. Please coninue to pray! Thanks!

I have amazing friends!

As I write this, my friends Kayla Beth Moore, Cara Hedges, Megan McSwain, Ah-reum Han, Pam Gray, Katie Hayes, and a handful of other Carson-Newman students are heading to Kolkata, India to spend about 10 days working with Freeset, an organization that works to free women from the sex industry by offering them legit jobs making free-trade bags to sell worldwide. It's a chance for these women to start over with freedom they were told would never come. My friends will also get to visit the places that Mother Teresa and William Carey worked, including Mother Teresa's Home for the Dying. Their lives are going to be impacted by the people they see and interact with, and in this moment, they have the chance to be Jesus' hands, feet, and heart in a distant land.

I echo Paul's sentiments in Colossians 2:5 when he said, "For though I am absent in body, yet I am with you in spirit, rejoicing to see your good order and the firmness of your faith in Christ."

I'm thankful to God that my friends will get to experience this life-altering and eye-opening trip, and I'm thankful for friends whose light of Jesus shines warmly and brightly.

Will you join me in prayer for them today?

God has been teaching me....

....nothing. Nothing, you say? That's right - the reason God hasn't been teaching me anything is because I haven't been reading my Bible. It's been a conscious effort on my part not to hear and apply the wisdom of God. In the past 2 weeks, I've probably picked up my Bible 3 times. This is a time in my life where I need God and His Word the most. I've been looking to others for vindication and allowing their opinion of me to shape my opinion of me.

That's just not okay.

Because I've allowed that to happen, my opinion of myself has swayed with the wind. Certainly, we should be aware of our own triumphs and downfalls, but at the end of the day, God's opinion of us is constant, never-changing. I know that my sin hurts Him, but His love for me does not change the way our human love so easily does. So I know I haven't written in a while, and this post is particularly brief, but take this post as an act of confession. I need prayer to keep going and specifically, to read my Bible.

Ah, it's so strange to think this time last year I was writing about my excitement over fall break (check it out here). I remember my worry and stress - this year it's been taken to an all new level! Ha. Last year my worry and anxiety were mainly over whether or not I could actually survive college. That's not the case this year. I love where I am and am confident in the classes I'm taking. This year the tests are just actually hard...as opposed to last fall semester. It's strange and surreal, but it's exciting to see where I am and how far I've come! One more night here at CN...then it's time for home. I can't wait.

Day in the Life

Here's the photographic narrative I had to make for my Digital Imaging class. Enjoy.

Thoughts?

So here is a possible logo for my photography and design creations. I appreciate any and all feedback! Thanks.

Hey guys...just wanted to clear something up. A few months ago (in May), I posted about a friend from high school who committed suicide. His sister IM'ed tonight, and we were able to talk for a bit; she let me know that it in fact was not suicide. He died in an automobile accident.

For any of you that knew Patrick or his family, please make an effort to stop the suicide rumor from being spread.

Also, please continue to pray for Patrick's family as they cope with this unimaginable tragedy.

*Philippians 4:7

I won't lie...

...death scares me so. I know that we are promised a life more abundant after death, but something about leaving loved ones behind leaves an empty place in my heart. I write this with tears in my eyes for a good friend of mine. This afternoon her grandfather died suddenly and unexpectedly while working outside. This is an absolute tragedy for their family, and it does truly break my heart. I'm reminded of CS Lewis' words on the passing of his cancer-stricken wife, Joy:

No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering in the stomach, the same restlessness, the yawning. I keep on swallowing. [...] There are moments, most unexpectedly, when something inside me tries to assure me that I don't really mind so much, not so very much, after all. Love is not the whole of a man's life. [...] People get over these things. Come, I shan't do so badly. One is ashamed to listen to this voice but it seems for a little to be making out a good case. Then comes a sudden jab of red-hot memory and all this "commonsense" vanishes like an ant in the mouth of a furnace.

- A Grief Observed

No one can offer comfort in times like these. I don't know how to; we don't know how to. I thank HIM that His word gives us the strength to utter the words we thought impossible.

Have you ever really thought about the "peace that surpasses all understanding" that Paul talks about? Sometimes verses are really easy to skim over, but take a closer look, and they become quite mind-boggling. Peace - peace that does not make sense. Peace that in the midst of horror and grief flows freely - that is peace that doesn't make sense. Peace that overcomes anger and depression - that is the peace that does not make sense. Thus, in my heart of hearts, I know that death has been overcome, and while the thought of it scares me, I know my God triumphs, reigns, and loves. He will wash away our fears.

My prayer is that she and her family are surrounded by an inexplicable peace.

Will you pray for her family today?

Urgent Prayer Request

Please pray for a friend of mine from high school, Chris Fine. He survived a terrible car crash and is now listed in critical condition at UT Hospital.

You can read the entire story here:

http://www.wbir.com/news/local/story.aspx?storyid=98420

The last news that I heard was that the doctors are not going to have to amputate his foot (which they once thought). Please continue to pray for God's blessing and healing. It is such a miracle that Chris survived and was conscious when he was found after 20 hours! Thanks for the prayers. I know Chris and his family will appreciate it.

Exciting News

I've been asked by a good friend of mine, Jen Davis, to shoot her engagement pictures! I'm so excited! As a graphic design student, of course my main focus is working on the computer. However, I've always dabbled in photography; in fact, my interest in Photoshop is what got me working on the computer hardcore. Another exciting facet of this is that the art department has agreed to lend me their reeeeeeally nice (NEW) Canon camera for the entire weekend of the shoot. Score!

If there are any photographers out there reading this, shoot me some tips on poses, lighting, etc.

New Year's Resolutions

Well, as we all know, most people set resolutions for themselves on December 31 only to be broken when Ben & Jerry's releases a new flavor. Well, my schedule's a bit off due to school, and for me, December 31 falls right in the middle of my school year. Rather than try to "start over" then, it's easier for me to set goals now, before I head back to school ... which is tomorrow.

One major thing I plan on adding to my schedule is a weekly dance class. I'm not overweight, but I'm tired of being unmotivated and out of shape. There's a dance studio basically on campus, so I plan on taking 1-2 dance classes there per week. I'm really excited about it because exercise is something that's important to me, but I haven't found my niche yet. I've always loved dance; I've tried running, swimming, and biking but none are fun or rewarding to me the way that dancing is.

Another goal of mine is to start a food journal. Again, I'm not looking to lose weight, but I want to be more conscious of what I'm putting into my body. Hopefully by doing this, I'll be less likely to put unhealthy foods into my body.

The aforementioned goals pertain to physical health, but my spiritual health is also in need of a revamping boost. All my life I've been a night person, so logic would determine that a "quiet time" would be best at night. However, I've realized that I have a tendency to put it off until the absolute latest opportunity, when the eyelids are already on the descent. So, my last and most important goal is to have a more consistent quiet time somewhere between 4:00 and 9:00. I'm going to wait until I get into the swing of things to determine a time, but determining a time is what's got to happen. By setting a time (ie 7:00), I pray that I'll be more likely to sit down with a focused heart and mind.

I ask that you pray for me in fulfilling these goals. Have you set any goals for yourself? Don't want until New Year's Eve...start now! Waiting only prolongs the delay in achieving your goals. Thanks for reading!

Looking Back...

Well, summer for me is almost up. A week from Wednesday (the 12th) I move back into my dorm up at Carson-Newman. A friend and I were talking today, and whenever we talk, it's like God's love is just bubbling over. I love this girl. She always asks me direct, meaningful questions, which take me aback yet for which I am so grateful. One question she always seems to ask is, "What has God taught you?" - in this case, over the summer. 

Hmm. 

One thing that I can say is that looking back to last summer, I do feel completely different. I've engaged in challenging conversations, met new friends, been a part of 2 churches with newly laid foundation (both of which are amazing - check out The Ridge Community Church and Arrowhead Church), read interesting books and really tried to delve deeper into the Word, taken tough and inspiring classes, and through all of this, grown closer to my Jesus. Through these things, God has shown me ... stuff. This past year, I've learned that one of the most important (if not the most important) means of sharing Christ's love is by being His hands. That doesn't mean whipping out our favorite verses in the first few minutes of a fresh conversation with a new friend. It does mean sacrifice of time, spirit, energy, and money. By sacrificing these to God through donation to others, people begin to see - through the Spirit's power in us - that maybe there is something (someONE) worth living for. Not to say that God needs me, but the fact that He chooses to use me leaves me no other option but to recklessly serve. I haven't always done that, but God deserves nothing less, so I'll keep striving. 

Second, I've learned that every day, every second, I must attempt to wrap my mind around the fact that God is enough for me. It's easy to fill my spiritual life with the overflow from my financial "happiness" and scholastic success. STUFF doesn't matter. Just in the past couple of weeks, I've really been thinking about the things my culture idolizes: fashion (cloth to cover your naked self), trendy TV (people pretending to be someone else for the sake of our own), high-end cars (machines that transport us from A to B), etc. That may sound random, but it's like it's all just hit me - all of that is so perishable and so fleeting. And I've been so caught up in it. Don't hear what I'm not saying - we don't need to be removed from culture. But this obsession is just suffocating. So, back to my point, obsession with all this stuff creates a taller and bigger wall between ourselves and God. I've felt this happening before. It's like every day is a struggle to be "Christian." However, removing ourselves from this obsession while remaining culturally relevant to people around us brings us closer to God's heart.

The question that's been on my heart all summer is one that I first read in Crazy Love by Francis Chan. It's a John Piper quote thats left me feeling really torn. I've thought about this, and it is a tough, tough question. I encourage you to ponder this question and see where you fall. Then, no matter where that is, let's all pray that God draws us closer and that in response, we live with total abandon to Jesus' call and commission.

"The critical question for our generation- and every generation- in this: If you could have heaven, with no sickness, and all the friends you ever had on earth, and all the food you ever liked, and all the leisure activities you ever enjoyed, and all the natural beauties you ever saw, all the physical pleasures you ever tasted, and no human conflict or any natural disasters- could you be satisfied with heaven, if Christ was not there?" - John Piper

Urgent Prayer Request

This was in our Carson-Newman email announcements today. Please pray.

For anyone who is willing to pray...

We just received word from Brazil that gunmen broke into our City of Youth facility  looking for Pastor Derli to kidnap and/or kill him. After 45 minutes, they were unable to locate him and left. We have recently had increased numbers of carjackings on the heavily-rutted road to the campus and have had many conversations with the police. It now seems either the police are working with the gunmen or there is corruption in the department (neither of which would be a surprise in Brazil) because the gunmen have been told that Hope Unlimited for Children is behind trying to get their activity stopped. Obviously, this is the kind of thing that can shut us down overnight. Please pray for safety for the hundreds of children and staff at our two campuses in Campinas-- and for wisdom for David and Philip as they address this situation. 

You might find it helpful to know that this coming Sunday there is scheduled a charity basketball game on our behalf between NBA players and the Brazilian National Team. This will take place in Rio, and NBA players are already arriving; related events begin tomorrow. ESPN-Brazil is covering the game, and ESPN-USA is filming several segments to be aired here this Fall.  Name recognition for Hope Unlimited is growing quickly with this and other things we have on the horizon. Satan does not want that to happen. Know that when you pray you are helping us fight a battle in the spiritual realm.

Ephesians 6:10-16
10 Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. 11 Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. 12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. 13 Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. 14 Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness; 15 And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace; 16 Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. 17 And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

Thank you in advance for your prayers on behalf of our children, staff, and their family members.

Susan & David Nowell

Good Fences Make Good Neighbors

What's been your worst, or strangest, neighborly experience? Mine goes a little something like this...

There is a rental house about 50 feet from our house on the same side of the road. It's junky and very cheap to rent. A lot of interesting travelers pass through there. One time a mom and her kids lived there. The mom, whenever we saw here, seemed kind of out it. Once her toddler ran into our yard stark naked covered in flour. The mom just walked into our yard and, without saying anything, picked him up and just walked back. It's not that I hated her, but I felt indifferent toward her. I didn't care that she was poor and broken. I just cared about her staying out of our yard. 

When Jesus was questioned about the greatest commandment, He replied that it is first and foremost to "love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." He followed that up with, "And a second [greatest commandment] is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself." Read more here: Matthew 22

It scares me to think that I'm preventing myself from investing in others because I'm clinging on to the things this side of Heaven, the things that give me security and keep my days neat and clean; I'm building those walls. That's not the life Jesus lived. He invested His life into those people...into us. I pray today that God softens my heart. What walls of ours are blocking out the neighbors?

I don't really have an introduction for this so...I'll just start. What does full sacrifice really mean? That's a churchy question that gets asked a lot, but how often have I pondered and toiled over this question? Has it impacted my life? No and no.

In Francis Chan's book Crazy Love, I've been really convicted to explore the question, how full is my giving of my life, time, and money to God? Is it lukewarm? In Revelation, Jesus talks about the Laodicean church that has become lukewarm, believing themselves to be Christians but acting out of pride and contentment. He says He'd rather have them be hot or cold, but that paradoxical in-between stage where they blur the lines of "Christian" isn't working. He'll spit out the lukewarm church from his mouth (Rev. 3:15-16)! To summarize what Chan says, why would Jesus spit Christians from his mouth? Thus, these people must not be who they think they are. Isn't that completely scary? He goes on to say that not every one who has had a lukewarm season is unsaved by that beautiful Grace...which is good news for all! But he does challenge those of us who are Christians to look within us and see where the lukewarm lies, and to look around us and see how lukewarm our churches and world (namely, our country) has become.

Big-C Church

I've been thinking lately about what it really means to be a member of the Church today. The Church is Christ's body. The body is made of different parts. It's not all arms, or all spleens, or all ears. Each part is completely distinct, yet all are interdependent. I read this last night by CS Lewis:

For the Church is not a human society of people united by their natural affinities but the Body of Christ, in which all members, however different, (and He rejoices in their differences and by no means wishes to iron them out) must share the common life, complementing and helping one another precisely by their differences.

[Ever feel completely blown away by an author's ability to coherently verbalize your own thoughts?] 

---

Another thought I've been thinking away...why do we have so many churches (little c)? Shouldn't the body be more united? Is the problem not enough Christlike churches, therefore more planting is needed, or is it the lack of community and fellowship among churches that leads to the problem? Granted, I attend a newly planted church that I know is God-centered and God-honoring. But what I mean is, can't we get back to the simplicity of just community and fellowship? I hope that we can but am not sure that we could. I have a great friend, Ah-reum, who is a Korean raised as a missionary kid in Africa. She told me that, coming to America, she was just astounded by the number of churches. This struck me. a) We take for granted the availability and convenience of our churches, and b) Why are there so many? I pray that our churches can be more united. There are many churches with many views, but my prayer is that the churches that are Christ-centered can work side-by-side, and the churches that aren't so Christ-centered will be reached by those that are.

What is big-C church and little-c church to you?

New Self?

Last year's new is this year's old.

Last night, God brought to mind Ephesians 4:24. Looking back on my past blogs, I feel really selfish. It's easy to rant and ramble on about my own life, but how often am I bursting to talk about God? That verse reminded me that now that I've been transformed by Christ, that change, and what a huge change it is, should be evident to myself and others.

" ... and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness."

New: completely revised, altogether modified to become better. In Christ we are made new. There is no other process in life that offers anything close to that. God's love is just that powerful. God's "new" doesn't change. What was once new to God is never outdated; it's ALWAYS going to be new.

Self: We are still us. God's promises aren't meant to scourge our identities away. His love is meant to enhance them. But again, because we still are ourselves, transforming into this new self doesn't mean all of our temptations and shortcomings will disappear. They're still going to be there. It's just that now, we have an escape. Rather than run aimlessly when sin attacks us, we can run to God. God's promises are full of direction. 

How are we showing people that we're new creations?

Learning to Cope

3 days ago I lost a friend from high school to suicide. He was wild and crazy, and people didn't give him credit for much...he let people think of him that way. I was fortunate enough to see a side of him that many people didn't. During my junior year, I would walk back and forth to lunch with Patrick. One day he said, "Hannah, you know exactly who you are and you are okay with that. Whoever is with you is a really lucky guy." I will never forget that. I still thought about it even before Patrick died. He had a kind heart that many people didn't expect from him. I always had some sort of intuitive fear that something would happen to him, that we would lose him. I didn't really keep up with him after senior year, but he did leave an impression on me. His life and death have brought to my mind how little I pray for those who I know are hurting. I was upset and confused when I heard the news, but that was the first time I had thought about Patrick in a while. I don't want to be that way. 

Today, I pray for Patrick's family, that God's peace and comfort would surround them. I pray that the do not turn away from God but run to him. Please pray.

How have you dealt with the tragic loss of a friend?

Oh, Happy Day ...

The B was a mistake. I have a 92 in Art Fundamentals. :)

Finally! Activity!

my two favorite things as of now: the pool and antm

So, I've been trying to find some sort of athletic...something that I enjoy. Tried running, and that was fun for a while, got a bit monotonous, and I ended up just giving up. I felt like a sqautty wannabe next to everyone else. So today I tried swimming at the SAC, and I must say, it was absolutely wonderful! I am a firm loather of sweat, and swimming perfectly compliments that. Usually when I exercise I get bored or too tired after about 20 

minutes, so I just quit. I was in there for 45 minutes today! I

 definitely want to keep this a habit because swimming is such a great workout for all parts of your body, not to mention I feel so relaxed from it. 
Ah...so for the third day in a row there is an America's Next Top Model marathon on, and tonight at 8 is this season's finale. Needless to say, I've been glued to the TV for a bit. I enjoy the show but at the same time feel lazy and guilty for watching some much television day-to-day when I have tons of other stuff I want to do with this precious and long-awaited free time. There are so many books I want to read, and now is the time for that.

This one's for you, Cara...

So today I got my last grade for this semester - and it was a B. In my easiest class. To be quite honest, I was/am completely vexed. I made all A's on my projects and 1 B, an 88. I'm a little irritated because I still don't know my grades on the last 2 projects, but I do know that of our 2 artist reviews and the final, I made all A's. I've emailed my teacher, called him, emailed him again, called him again - no, I'm not above begging. I'm also not against speaking with someone of higher authority in the art department. For now, I'm going to breathe, breathe...breeeeeathe.

On a brighter note, today I was fuming in my bed, trying to take a nap when my phone rang. I was nervous that it might be my teacher (ever want to talk to someone but am terrified by that idea at the same time??). Ah, what a wonderful surprise. CARA! It's been less than a week, but I feel totally lost without all my close friends from school. We just picked up where we left off, whining and laughing about grades and life and all that jazz. It was absolutely fantastic. Occasions like that do remind what's important in life. That call came right when I needed it. Thanks, Cara. :)

1 day down, 14 to go...

Today was my first day of May Term. 3 hours of Environmental Science - long yes, but we did watch Planet Earth. I'm hoping for more days like that. I'm feeling so ... adult. Ha, just saying that kind of negates it. I'm living at the Honors House while I'm here for May Term. It's an actual house, and last night I did some grocery shopping (with Brad...hehe). It feels weird to have a house to yourself (I do have a housemate...but still!). 

Okay, so again with the weird motherly instincts. Last night I dreamt that I had a child - and yes, I do remember what he/she (no, can't remember the gender, lol) looked like. That was the strangest part, that I woke up and could remember what the child looked like and what it felt like to hold it! Don't know what to make of that...well, it was kind of exciting.

Mmmm.....finals........

Well, today I took my next to last final. It was for Graphic Design, and I actually had fun with it. We had to redesign the cover of our textbook. The attached photo is my finished version. Tomorrow I have New Testament, and after that, I'm technically done. I will, however, be here for 2 1/2 more weeks for May Term...yeah, it kinda sucks, but it was my choice because I need to get science credits in, but that's so hard during the regular school year because of all the studio hours I have. Ahh...the life of a busy college student. I truly do love it.

I can't believe my first year of college is coming to a close. Really, that's still a surreal thought to me. I have honestly loved being here, making the best friends I've made, and learning more about the person God intends for me to be. Brad and I have made it through what I think would be the roughest year for a couple, and every day I am learning new things about him that no one else knows - it's rather rewarding. I'm looking forward to being home this summer, but I can't help but expectantly look forward to move-in day in August. There are people here that I cannot see myself ever living without, and I feel like I've know them for a lifetime. God has been so good to me.

In closing, how am I honoring God with my life? How are you? Questions to ponder on...

Weekend Update

Well, I guess it's about time that I update on what's going on in my life. The semester is nearing its end (GASP), and then after that I'll be doing May Term until about the end of May. Big news - I talked with my parents, and they're going to help me fulfill my dream of studying abroad!!! Next summer, I'll be going to Florence and Rome, Italy for a month!! The summer after that, I'll be going to Africa for 2 weeks! I'll be getting 12 hours credit total from those 2 trips, and with those hours freed up in my regular school year schedule, I can add a religion minor! God is so good! I'm so excited about this. I pray that God will use all of this for his glory. I don't want to get tied up in the logistics of it - I want to praise him always.
One of my good friends Holly always inspires me. She's a fountain of wisdom, truly. She was telling me about this tattoo she wants to get on the inside part of her sole - one foot says, "God saves" and the other, "God pursues." She told me this message changed her life, and she wanted to bring that to other people (hence the writing on the feet). I've never really thought of God as a pursuer. I see Him as almighty, but I don't see Him as running after me. But He does. He pursues us with more passion than any lover and more heart than any saint. I love that about God. Our acceptance of Christ as our Lord does not come as a shock to God, but as a fulfillment of His love that He pours out on us. He is on the move.

"The winds of God are always blowing, but you must set the sails."

Minding my own business

I've got a lot on my mind. A LOT. I keep trying to tell myself a religion minor can't be done, but it keeps popping up in my head. I don't want to think that is coincidence. It is possible, but it would require a lot of time and money, the former being the most burdensome. I want to do it so badly - I'm going to keep working and see what doors are opened. If they lead me down the path of adding another minor, then wonderful. If not, then that's okay, too.

Snow and Tests ...

It snowed a lot today. It was nice, and I hope it will hold over long enough to get us out of school tomorrow. That would be absolutely splendid because I have a New Testament test on Wednesday that would must definitely facilitate an entire Tuesday of studying. Okay, so it would also be nice to sleep in a bit.
I have something that I've been thinking about lately that I am now seriously considering - double majoring. I had planned on minoring in English, but the more I think about it the more I realize that I would really enjoy higher level Literature classes. I was looking in the catalog today, and some of the upper level classes sound so wonderful to me - Literature & Film, in particular. If I double majored, that means I would need to take two Graphic Design/Art classes per semester and two English classes per semester until graduation. That puts me at twelve semester hours, and when you factor in other necessary hours (such as Speech), I think it could work. Dr. Crutchley mentioned something to me today - he said I should think about minoring in religion. If I did that, I'd have to take one religion course per semester until graduation, which puts me at fifteen hours already plus the other stuff I would need. I don't think I could handle that, because it would put me at at least eighteen hours per semester until I graduate. No, thank you. So, for now, I am seriously considering adding that major. For anyone who may read this, keep that in your prayers.
Speaking of prayers, I've noticed that I've been praying a lot more throughout the day. Just little prayers, nothing long or eloquent, which I think is okay. I don't think God likes formalities - the veil's already been torn. I was also talking to a friend recently who said that she has been asking God specifically for things that are His - ie, His grace, His love, His mercy, rather than "Grant me grace, love, and mercy." Now I don't think it's always right to get wrapped up in the syntax of something, but this really struck me. We can come to God, freely ask for something that is His, and then He gives it to us - amazing. It is easy to forget that Jesus tells us to ask God for our heart's desire (Matthew 7), but the key is that our hearts must first be in line with God's Word and will.
I pray today for God's peace during the times of stress, His mercy to those that seem harder to love, and His love that allows me to look at the world through His eyes, if just for a moment.

Dear Editor ...

So - big news. I'm getting a letter published in People Magazine!! I was thanking them for including Brad Renfro in their "Farewells 2008" edition. Renfro was an actor from Knoxville who was in many big Hollywood films (Tom & Huck, anyone??). He had a big drug problem, though, and ended up overdosing this past year. At last year's Oscars, when they had a tribute to all the different Hollywood people who had passed away, Renfro was snubbed for the sake of many lesser-known actors and "Hollywood people." Despite all his problems, he was still a great actor and worthy of recognition, so that was kinda rude on the part of the Oscar committee.
So look out for the January 26 edition of People!

on the road again ...

Well I'm back at CN now. I came back on Sunday around 5:30 and spent the rest of the night unpacking. Honestly, I was excited to come back ... and then when I got here, I was just ecstatic! This place feels so much like home to me now. And seeing all of the friends I hadn't seen in 3 1/2 weeks ... ah, it was amazing!
Yesterday I went with that Anna and that Lindsay to visit Alex in Johnson City. It was so much fun. Especially seeing Alex and her a m a z i n g condo! I really love that girl. Well, all those girls. :)
Today I've just moseyed around. Raining a lot. I went with Megan to Subway today and got a flatbread sandwich. I hadn't gotten one of those from there before, and I ended up being pleasantly surprised!
Speaking of surprises, I am actually really looking forward to school starting. I guess after a while, laying around, sleeping, & eating sporadically every day gets kind of old. I'm ready to be back on a schedule. And I'm also very excited about my classes! All of them are very interesting to me, especially my first official graphic design class!! I picked up my books yesterday, and the graphic design typography book is mind-blowing. I love it.
Now for one of my favorite activities: organizing (seriously)! Classes start tomorrow, so I'm going to get everything in order and try to get to bed early.